• Random Quote

    Suckers are completely impractical. Why do you need a giant inedible stick poking out of your piece of hard candy?

The Bundle-of-Joy Taxi

You take an old armored car and outfit it with all the newest safety technology – all-wheel drive, all-weather tires, brush guards and roll cages all the way around, flashing caution lights, and external airbags like those big inflatable bowling bumpers. You pad the back like a sanitarium cell, and bolt down a velour lazy boy recliner with a fur-covered 6-point harness. Put in some soft lighting, and speakers that play soothing classical at a low volume. Park outside hospitals and charge new parents an exorbitant amount to transport them home with their newborn infants. I’ve never had kids, but I can imagine that must be the most frightening drive of a new parent’s life. You might even be able to get it covered by insurance!

Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

code

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.