Gender: None of Your Business


More and more, I am of the opinion that gender has no place in legislation, whatsoever. Progress isn’t writing new laws allowing additional, fluid, or ambiguous genders – progress is eliminating gender from law, and from public record, all together. It’s eliminating the idea that one needs to “identify” publicly at all, or that one requires permission from another to do so.

If law is to apply to every person equally, it doesn’t need to know your gender.

Transition from one gender to another should be a personal matter, not a legal matter.

Medical conditions specific to gender are a matter for each individual and their healthcare providers. The genitals you’re born with, just like your blood type and congenital conditions, don’t need to be a matter of public record.

Privacy and safety concerns, per individual, can be addressed without attention to gender, as predators come in all genders, and so do their targets.

Your driver’s license lists your physically defining characteristics, which are easily verifiable by any observer, as well as a number which has been assigned to you, specifically, by the government. There’s no reason to have your gender on your driver’s license unless the cop plans to look down your pants to check, and even then, it may not match what he or she considers traditional.

If consenting adults wish to get married, it should be a personal decision between those adults, and shouldn’t require permission from anyone else, least of all the government, regardless of the genders involved.

If a citizen of the United States wants to join the military and fight for their country, and they’re able to pass the standard physical tests put in place to prove that they can effectively do so, then they should be allowed to do so, regardless of their sex or gender identity. This seems like a no-brainer. And no, I don’t advocate for different physical standards for different sexes – there should be one standard, which should be set at a practical level realistically equal to what soldiers will be required to face in the field. If a person who menstruates wishes to risk doing so in a combat situation, that’s their prerogative, not yours.

And lastly, for those of you so worried about hitting on someone with the wrong parts, why not get to know someone and ask some important questions before jumping in bed with them? “Hello, are you disease free? Do you practice safe sex? I happen to be attracted to vaginas, do you have one of those? Great!

It’s not that difficult.

While I believe in this level of mutual privacy and respect, I also believe that one’s journey in life, while subjectively important to that person and those in their direct experience, isn’t that objectively important. It’s important to understand the issues that can and do affect those around us in order to expand our understanding of the general human condition, teach open-mindedness and tolerance, and give courage to those quietly dealing with similar issues, but one should never obligate others to care. Stop believing that anyone is entitled to attention and support. No one is obligated to care about you except your parents, and you should never judge or attack anyone for simply staying out of your way and not giving a shit. That said, if someone chooses to judge you or attack you because they disagree with your journey, then they have willingly entered the arena of public discourse, and by all means, fire back!

Remember, there are only two teams: team Cool People and team Shitty People. Neither team cares what color you are, what gender you are, what your annual income is, or what your sexuality is. They only care how you treat others. Team Cool People only requires that you give others the space and mutual respect to co-exist peacefully. It doesn’t require that you advocate – only that you tolerate. So please, join team Cool People, and stop caring so much about others’ business, or obligating others to care about yours.

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